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This brings me to the next point…when their children reach adolescence and are trying to establish their autonomy, are capable of taking care of themselves and have seen the contrast between their narcissistic parent and ‘normal’ parents, the narcissist loses control of their children. All hell breaks loose! This is when affairs and divorces are likely to occur. Their children are the antithesis of narcissistic supply! Narcissists don’t mine for supply where there is little or none. They will rage at their children and make outrageous threats to regain control. There is little ‘doting’ and ‘adoration’ anymore! This is not love! Students in the US go to school for about 7 hours a day. That’s a lot of hours for elementary school kids. My child is in a public school now, and she comes home with 1 page of homework a night, and it’s usually math. No homework on Fri and the weekend. Once in a while, she has a test to study for, and she usually has a week to study. They do all their writings, science, and social study projects in school. I started to realize how nice this arrangement is for us. DD loves sports, and this gives her plenty of time to go to all her sports practices. She also has time to practice violin and even be in 2 choirs. We have time to cook , watch a little TV , or play board games as a family, and that’s every night! She still remembers to read 20 minutes every weeknight before bed. And this is a kid who hates reading! Her school does follow the common core curriculum, which irked me at the beginning. But when I saw how the teachers were allowed to choose a program that worked for the district, with parents’ input, I can see that not all common core are created equal. (One of her previous private schools in another state used common core also, but I couldn’t understand their math methods for the life of me, and I am an engineer.) I can actually help her with her math. I even teach some of the lessons for the area schools. She was barely meeting her reading level to being on the top of her grade. Her writing skills also improved by leaps and bounds. They learned how to research a subject, create the Powerpoint slides, and present them in front of their class. And except for math homework, everything else was done in school.
Now I am finally recovered, I’d love to be working or to start a business with my craft, but I’d need to rent a shop or buy a shed to work in and that requires money. I have been trying to save, but despite my frugal lifestyle have not saved a penny yet. I’m still usually down to zero by the end of each month. But hey ho, at least I do have a roof over my head and I’m happy and healthy and I have the love of my children and grandchildren who are around. That’s all I’ve ever really wanted and it’s enough. Children love their parents unconditionally and are wired to attach to them because their survival is totally dependent upon their parents. This provides the parent with power, control, adoration and admiration, validation, attention and servitude! They can behave without restraint and there is no accountability. Their children cannot leave and will still love them and perceive them as omnipotent! They control every aspect of their children’s lives. No one gets past them to influence, enlighten, support, comfort. indulge, advise or bond with their child. They won’t allow it! They are the sole force in their children’s lives. Having children ensures that their spouses will stay at least until the children are older or the narcissist decides to discard them. It also places them in a virtuous role/position. People admire families, especially those who appear ‘close’. Narcissists are masters at creating appearances. Publicly they get a lot of attention from strangers as well as acquaintances. People compliment what great parents and adorable kids they are. At home the child emotional needs, opinions, requests, preferences and interests are completely disregarded especially when they conflict with their narcissistic parents agenda. Narcissists don’t feel so much as a twinge of guilt in denying their children something of great importance to the child. They are only thinking of what they want and what is best for themselves. Their whole image as a parent and constant flow of narcissistic supply as well as their children’s devotion , admiration, loyalty, and obedience causes them to believe that they love and adore their children. In reality their children are tools. Their hyper focus and vigilant, ‘care’ of their children could be compared to a genie in a lamp…as long as the genie keeps granting your wishes, you are going to take damn good care of that lamp! No one is going to get their hands on your lamp and get benefits from it!
On Father’s Day weekend, we went to check out my father-in-law’s property. It looked like pure trash. It had not been cut in nine months because Jill and her husband stole the tractor. We could not even get to the fishing pond because the grass was taller than my kids. My husband demanded they return the tractor. After a couple of nasty text messages, they returned it. We live out of town. My husband took off work to go cut his daddy’s grass only to find the tractor was completely inoperable. The steering wheel could be completely removed. The mechanic said it had not been cranked in months. It was left under a tree, and the acid from the leaves severely damaged the tractor. It will cost us a grand to fix. My husband demanded an explanation from Jill. As a result, Jill’s husband called my husband and told him to leave Jill alone. Then he threatened him with physical violence. The shit totally hit the fan, and Jill has caused a shit storm of drama that has now gotten to a dangerous level. I am done with Jill. What’s sad is that we still have to have some sort of contact with her until probate is done. She texted my husband the other day saying she was pre-approved for a loan to buy him out. We know this is another lie. What bank would give her a loan when she has no job? She said she would send the paperwork to the probate attorney. Of course that hasn’t happened, and it’s been three weeks since she sent that text. I don’t know what’s up her sleeve next, but I know she is plotting and planning to take that land out from under us. If you are the praying kind, we could sure use some prayers. Thanks for listening! I think schools definitely should max out homework for 1 hour, TOTAL. If they can’t get all their work done in school, esp. in elementary school level, then they should really look into their curriculum and see why. I sub for mostly elementary classes in the district, and each class is about 1 hour long, which is pretty long for young children. We spend about 10–15 minutes for lessons, then the students would work on their own. I can usually give them a 10-min break before the next subject. Each day we also have enough time for reading together or by themselves. Our district is ranks very high in the state, and I can see why.
Suitable for Women/Men/Girl/Boy, Fashion 3D digital print drawstring hoodies, long sleeve with big pocket front. It’s a good gift for birthday/Christmas and so on, The real color of the item may be slightly different from the pictures shown on website caused by many factors such as brightness of your monitor and light brightness, The print on the item might be slightly different from pictures for different batch productions, There may be 1-2 cm deviation in different sizes, locations, and stretch of fabrics. Size chart is for reference only, there may be a little difference with what you get.
- Material Type: 35% Cotton – 65% Polyester
- Soft material feels great on your skin and very light
- Features pronounced sleeve cuffs, prominent waistband hem and kangaroo pocket fringes
- Taped neck and shoulders for comfort and style
- Print: Dye-sublimation printing, colors won’t fade or peel
- Wash Care: Recommendation Wash it by hand in below 30-degree water, hang to dry in shade, prohibit bleaching, Low Iron if Necessary
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